The quality of a relationship is more important than the gender of the people in it.
A Civil Union in Vermont
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Odd
questions.... .....civil answers! |
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| 1 | Why a "Civil Union" or "Gay Marriage"? | |
| We don't want "gay
marriage." We simply want EQUAL marriage rights. The term
"gay marriage" implies that we want something different
from what other married couples have. We aren't even talking about
weddings here… simply the piece of paper that acknowledges
a civil, legal union. We share all the same responsibilities as straight
couples, but get few of the benefits. Financially, we pay at least
$6000 a year more in lost benefits than married couples. Emotionally,
the cost is immeasurable.
Reference: San Francisco Examiner 1989 Report "Gay in America" |
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| 2 | Marriage is traditionally defined as the union of a man and a woman. | |
| Just because something
has always been a certain way does not make it right. But, to answer
the charge, we'd point out that history is filled with many same-sex
marriages. Judaic scriptures, for example, shows that ancient Egypt
recognized same-sex unions as marriages, as did imperial Rome. Same-sex
unions were an important and recognized facet of life in classical
Greece, Republican Rome, Imperial China, Africa, Australia and Central
Asia. So there is virtually no continent in the world that has not
recognized same-sex unions as a part of their civilization. Even in
the United States of America, we DO have a history of legal same-sex
marriages. At one time, same-sex citizens of the US who were married
under their Indian tribal law, were also recognized as married under
some state laws.
In modern times, other countries do afford more equal rights. In Canada, for example, the Supreme Court has ruled that provincial laws must be changed to treat same-sex couples the same as legally-married couples. Hungary treats all common-law marriages the same, including gay and lesbian unions. France, Sweden, Norway, Finland and Denmark all have nearly-equal marriage laws. The European Parliament adopted a resolution in 1994 calling for review of legalization of same-sex marriage all across Europe. Reference: Canada:
AP, 4/24/98 "Same-Sex Couples Win in Canada" |
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| 3 | Homosexuality is an "alternate lifestyle choice." Why don't you just change? | |
| Excuse us for yawning...
we know you're serious. We can't speak for everyone, but our same-sex
attractions date back to the years when we could barely change our
own clothes - let alone our sexual orientation. There is, in fact,
substantial research that defines that sexual orientation is decided
at (or before) birth. As for "changing," consider this.
If our roles were reversed, and the state was forcing you to become
homosexual just to make other people happy - would you be able to
change? Would you be able to divorce your current spouse and become
sexually involved with a person of the same sex?
Reference: Scientific American; May 1994 |
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| 4 | But it's against my religion, it's against the Bible, and against God's will. | |
| First of all, this should
be a moot point, due to the "separation of church and state."
However, even lawmakers like to quote the Bible on this issue, so
this is for them. The Bible, like most ancient texts, was translated
from another language by fallible earthly beings. Even Catholic priests
have suggested that each of the five specific mentions of homosexuality
in the Bible is an erroneous translation, or taken out of context.
However, those who insist upon a literal anti-gay translation will want to abide by all laws of the scriptures, right? Leviticus, the homophobe's favorite, also says that they must give a tenth of their income to the church, churches must perform animal sacrifice, and that all adulterers will be put to death. It should be noted that none of Christ's own teachings (Gospels of the New Testament) ever condemns same-sex unions or intimacy. Moreover, many of the major religions actually perform, or have performed, religious blessings of same-sex unions. Rabbis have frequently endorsed same-sex marriage in the Jewish faith, Mormon founder Joseph Smith himself used to "seal" men to each other and bless their unions. The Catholic church even had a liturgy just for that occasion. The popular saints Sergei and Bacchus were glorified after being united in one such ceremony. Reference: Father D. Helminiak, "What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality" 94, and John Boswell, "Same-Sex Unions in Pre-Modern Europe" 1994 |
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| 5 | Same-sex marriages don't procreate, so they serve no purpose. | |
| This is untrue for many
reasons. For one, gays and lesbians DO have children, through a variety
of methods. There are now millions of children with same-sex parents.
However, the question is actually whether or not procreation is the
purpose of marriage. If so, then infertile/sterile couples should
not be allowed to marry, either. Nor should those who are past child-bearing
age, or those who simply choose not to have children. It is constitutionally
proven that the State cannot force a couple to have a child.
Reference: Wm. Eskridge, "Case for Same-Sex Marriage" - Chapter 4 |
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| 6 | But the poor children of homosexuals will grow up warped, queer and corrupt! | |
| Now that there are many
same-sex parents whose families can be studied, the results have completely
disproved these concerns. Firstly, the children raised by homosexual
parents are no more likely to become gay or lesbian than those raised
by two heterosexual parents. In other aspects, not only are the children
of homosexuals equal in every aspect to their straight-raised counterparts
- they actually excel in some cases. For example, children raised
in two-parent homosexual households, were academically and socially
superior to those raised in single-parent homes. Not allowing them
to grow up with married parents in a socially-supported home is the
real danger to these children!
Reference: Patterson, 1994; Golombok at al, 1983; Gottman, 1990; Green 1978 & 1967 |
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| 7 | It will destroy marriage and the American family! | |
| How, exactly? Marriage discourages promiscuity and promotes commitment, and encourages stable, two-parent households. When the two of us get married will straights suddenly want to call it quits? With the divorce rate of heterosexual marriage already at an all-time high (more than half!), why would anyone discourage couples who are actively promoting the strength and value of marriage? | ||
| 8 | Why should our government promote such activities? | |
| Currently the most nefarious of all villains can marry. It is perfectly legal for a convicted rapist to marry a pedophile - as long as they are a heterosexual rapist and pedophile. Does this mean the State is approving or encouraging their lifestyles? The State does not have a "morality" clause in granting a marriage license, and receiving one does not imply State approval of anything. | ||
| 9 | What's next... legal bigamy? | |
Folks love to play the
"What if.." argument when they run out of substantive concerns.
We could play it the other way by saying "If same-sex marriage
is unacceptable, then what will we ban next... interracial marriages?
Cross-faith unions?" See what we mean? This doesn't seem
to be an argument, but a panic. However, to attempt an
answer on subjects we know nothing about, we would say that the State
does have a "compelling interest" to reject the legality
of polygamous marriages. We agree with at least three reasons for
this:
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| 10 | But sixty percent of Americans oppose same-gender marriage! | |
| In 1967, nearly 75% of
all Americans were opposed to inter-racial marriages, yet they were
ruled legal that same year. 1
NOTE: Despite that ruling, that archaic law prohibiting mixed-race marriages stayed on the books in South Carolina until November 1998! Believe it or not, in that 1998 election, 40% of voters in that State still voted to keep the law banning interracial marriages! 2 As you can see, regardless of popular opinion, mob rules has never been a good precedent for making laws. 1
Reference: J. Trosino, "Same-Sex Marriage and the Miscegenation
Analogy" Boston University Law Review
(1993) |
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